Muslim Character

Sent to Perfect Good Manners

In the month of Rabi al-Awwal, the Seerah of the Prophet (PBUH) is in people's minds. If we love the Prophet, we should be thinking of his Seerah and applying it to our lives all the time — and character is one of the most important aspects of the Seerah we need to emulate. Yahya related that the Prophet (PBUH) said, "I have only been sent to perfect good manners" (Malik).

وَإِنَّكَ لَعَلى خُلُقٍ عَظِیمٍ

“And indeed, you are upon a noble conduct, an exemplary manner.”

Al-Qalam 68:4

The Best Nation

Are we behaving like the best of people? Do others think we have the best of character? If not, we need to see why — starting with something as simple as being a good neighbor, and Muslims behaving like Muslims.

كُنتُمْ خَیْرَ أُمَّةٍ أُخْرِ جَتْ لِلنَّاسِ

“You are indeed the best community that has ever been brought forth for the good of mankind.”

Al-Imran 3:110

Full of Mercy Towards One Another

Are we acting with mercy toward each other? How do we deal with workers and scholars?

مُّحَمَّدٌ رَّسُولُ اللهَّ ِ وَالَّذِینَ مَعَهُ أَشِدَّاء عَلَى الْكُفَّارِ رُ حَمَاء بَیْنَهُمْ تَرَ اهُمْ رُ كَّعًا سُجَّدًا یَبْتَغُونَ فَضْلاً مِّنَ اللهَّ ِ وَرِ ضْوَانًا سِیمَاهُمْ فِي وُجُوهِهِم مِّنْ أَثَرِ السُّجُودِ

“MUHAMMAD is Allah's Apostle; and those who are [truly] with him are firm and unyielding towards all deniers of the truth, [yet] full of mercy towards one another. You can see them bowing down, prostrating themselves [in prayer], seeking favour with Allah and His goodly acceptance; their marks are on their faces, traced by prostration.”

Al-Fath 48:29

The Prophet Is Our Model

Yazid ibn Yabnus said, "We went to 'A'isha and said, 'Umm al-Mu'minin, what was the character of the Messenger of Allah like?' She replied, 'His character was the Qur'an.'"

لَقَدْ كَانَ لَكُمْ فِي رَسُولِ اللهَّ ِ أُسْوَةٌ حَسَنَةٌ لِّمَن كَانَ یَرْجُو اللهَّ َ وَالْیَوْمَ الآْخِرَ وَذَكَرَ اللهَّ َ كَثِیرً ا

“VERILY, in the Apostle of God you have a good example for everyone who looks forward [with hope and awe] to God and the Last Day, and remembers God unceasingly.”

Al-Ahzab 33:21

Forty Years in the Making

The Prophet (PBUH) worked among his people for 40 years before bringing them the message. He established his character and earned two titles, Al-Sadiq (the truthful) and Al-Amin (the trustworthy). He even managed to avoid a major tribal conflict in Makkah when it came time to replace the Black Stone during the Ka'aba's repair, purely because of his known character. You can earn all sorts of bad nicknames, but earning titles like Al-Sadiq and Al-Amin requires real effort — such was our Prophet's character.

As the poet said: "Indeed nations continue to exist with moral standards, and they cease to exist the moment their moral standards are lost." Does this not describe us?

Rights of Parents

Take care of the elderly — if your children see you care for your parents now, they will, in sha' Allah, be there for you. Some people continue caring for a difficult, even abusive, parent simply because that parent once cared for their own spouse.

وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلاَّ تَعْبُدُواْ إِلاَّ إِیَّاهُ وَبِالْوَ الِدَیْنِ إِحْسَانًا إِمَّا یَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلاَهُمَا فَلاَ تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفٍّ وَلاَ تَنْهَرْ هُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلاً كَرِ یمًا وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّیَانِي صَغِیرً ا

“Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour, and, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: My Lord, bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood.”

Al-Isra 17:23-24

Good Character Extends to Everyone

Good akhlaq is for everyone — parents, relatives, the poor, orphans, all of mankind. Even a travelling companion beside you deserves good treatment.

وَاعْبُدُواْ اللهَّ َ وَلاَ تُشْرِ كُواْ بِهِ شَیْئًا وَبِالْوَ الِدَیْنِ إِحْسَانًا وَبِذِي الْقُرْبَى وَالْیَتَامَى وَالْمَسَاكِینِ وَالْجَارِ ذِي الْقُرْبَى وَالْجَارِ الْجُنُبِ وَالصَّاحِبِ بِالجَنبِ وَابْنِ السَّبِیلِ وَمَا مَلَكَتْ أَیْمَانُكُمْ إِنَّ اللهَّ َ لاَ یُحِبُّ مَن كَانَ مُخْتَالاً فَخُورً ا

“And do good unto your parents, and near of kin, and unto orphans, and the needy, and the neighbour from among your own people, and the neighbour who is a stranger, and the friend by your side, and the wayfarer, and those whom you rightfully possess. Verily, God does not love any of those who, full of self-conceit, act in a boastful manner.”

An-Nisa 4:36

Walking Humbly on the Earth

Allah SWT commands us to say what is best. The servants of Allah walk with humility on the earth and are not arrogant — this is a characteristic of true believers, for Allah hates kibr (pride) in all its forms.

وَعِبَادُ الرَّحْمَنِ الَّذِینَ یَمْشُونَ عَلَى الأْ َرْضِ هَوْنًا وَإِذَا خَاطَبَهُمُ الْجَاهِلُونَ قَالُوا سَلاَمًا

“For, [true] servants of the Most Gracious are [only] they who walk gently on earth, and who, whenever the foolish address them, reply with [words of] peace.”

Al-Furqan 25:63

Character as the Weightiest Deed

The Prophet (PBUH) said to Mu'adh: "Fear Allah wherever you are, follow up an evil deed with a good deed, and when you meet with the people, interact with good character" — three phrases, but beautiful and comprehensive.

Abu Darda' (RA) narrated the Prophet (PBUH) said: "There is nothing heavier in the balance of Allah than good behavior" (Abu Dawood). Abu Hurairah (RA) narrated: "The things that make people enter paradise are Taqwa and good manners" (Tirmidhi). When a man asked 'A'isha (RA) about the Prophet's character, she replied, "Have you not read the Quran: 'And verily, you are on an exalted standard of character?'" (Ibn Majah). And when the Prophet (PBUH) looked in the mirror he would say, "O Allah, in as much as You made my shape good, make my character good" (Ahmad).

"The best blessing that a person can be given in this life is character." Abu Hurairah (RA) narrated the Prophet (PBUH) said: "You cannot have the ability to encompass people through your wealth, but you can accommodate them with your pleasantness and good manners." In another hadith he said, "Mankind has not been given anything better than good character," and Abdullah bin 'Amr reported the Prophet said, "The best among you are those who have the best manners and character" (Bukhari).

Never Trivialize Small Kindness

A person asked the Prophet (SAW) for advice, and he responded: "Be firm, be perseverant, be straight in your following of the straight path. Let your character be good to the people." He also said, "Have fear of Allah, and do not trivialize anything of goodness, even if it is that you take from your bucket of water and pour it into your brother's bucket," and, "Even if you were to meet your brother with a smiling face, do not trivialize it."

He also said, "If someone curses you or tries to find fault with you in a matter that does not exist in you, do not find fault with him in a matter that he does have" — even if he lies about you and slanders you, do not point out his mistakes. "Leave him, because the evil of that deed will be against him, and the good will be for you."

Closing

We pray that Allah subhaanahu wa ta'aala grants us knowledge, grants us the character to preach and act upon that knowledge, resurrects us alongside the Prophet (SAW), grants us his shifa'a, and grants us Jannah through our deeds and Allah's forgiveness.